Dear Men Who Love Blow Jobs (Advice From a Woman)

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big bonerDear Men Who Love Blow Jobs,

I was one of those girls who used to gag at the thought of having to give my man a blow job.

Porn ruined it for most of us women. It put the idea in your head (the one down below) that forcefully gouging us in the mouth for your own pleasure was suppose to be sexy and appealing to us ladies.

But all that has changed now: I fucking LOVE giving blow jobs!

Here are some juicy tips on how to present your gorgeous cock for us ladies to worship with uninhibited splendor and ravishing reverence…


josephine_baker1. Honor Your Own Cock

It all begins right here. If you honor your cock and treat it as the “Holy Shaft of Light” that it is, we will follow in suit. Start with a re-naming ceremony.

While there is nothing dirty or wrong with referring to your member as a “dick” or “cock”, try on a more gentle title that will roll off your lover’s tongue like a mantra painted on silk.

In Neo-Tantra, practitioners have taken on ancient Sanscrit terms such as Lingham (meaning “wand of light”) or Vajra (meaning “lightning bolt”) to bring the holy back to your sexy power tool. Have your woman vote for her favorite name and reference your schlong with it’s spiritual moniker from here on out. “Hey babes, will you suck on my dick?” can now be replaced with, “Lover, will you honor my holy wand of luscious light?”

2. Ditch The Porn Fantasies

News Flash: A majority of women in the world DO NOT want to be aggressively ass fucked, gang banged, objectified, or pretty much porn raped as portrayed in your favorite pornographic films.

While “hard and dirty sex” does have it’s place in the lovemaking ritual, most of us conscious chicks desire sweet and tender love, romantic intimacy and soul connection in the bedroom.

Forcefully stuffing your boner in her mouth and holding her head down while she chokes, gags and pukes a bit is NOT sexy. Nor does it allow us women the opportunity to honor your wand with the gentle feminine energy we embody. Leave your porn fantasies at the door and be open minded to other ways to receive pleasure from your Goddess… on her terms.

BLOGErotic 007

3. Keep It Squeaky Clean

Here is a BIG secret that will immediately uplevel your chance at getting a killer blow job: WASH YOUR PENIS! Even if you had just washed it before you picked her up for your dinner date, your junk is most likely sweaty and sticky an hour later.

So before you move into bedroom mode, take a quick visit to the Loo and give your Blessed Boner a thorough spit, rinse and shine.

b581c94f872292be0a28d74337dd9aabIf you are uncircumcised, please pull back your foreskin and rinse the stinky schmegma out of those hidden crevices that her tongue will surely find (even if that means sticking your woody in the bathroom sink for a moment).

So many women avoid sucking dick because it is sweaty, stinky and tastes like ass.

You can’t smell it, but trust me… it is a breeding ground of stank and I doubt YOU would take that thing in your mouth (let alone the back of your throat) once you smelt it. Pay it forward and wash your willy!

4. Let Her Drive The Show

Brothers of the Holy Lingham, take your hands off the driving wheel and let her guide the show. In fact, tie your hands behind your back and force your hips to remain motionless. (Don’t worry, you can regain control later when you bang her brains out to the far reaches of the Universe!) Prop yourself up on the bed with pillows behind your back and present your Magic Wand to her so she can comfortably bow down in “Namaste” and have her way with you. Your woman will enjoy the process when SHE can control her own motions, licks, and gobbles that also give HER pleasure. If she’s not enjoying it, what’s the point?

Imagine how hot it would be if she went into an ecstatic cock worshiping frenzy in your honor, giving HERSELF waves of orgasms as she slides your shaft slowly and carefully into the depths of her mouth.

If you still don’t understand why this is so crucial to let her guide the show, refer back to #2.

f4899529f3d3dda6acc6aedd1c5456d35. Play Show and Tell

At the same time, you can gently educate your woman on how YOU like your Vajra Sword worshiped. I’d suggest NOT doing this during the heat of the BJ moment, as this shifts the energy back to you being in control. Women are sensitive to criticism, especially in the middle of the act, and even more so if the art of enjoyable blow jobs is a new venture for her.

I know this may sound a bit edgy for a straight guy, but I suggest whipping out your girlfriend’s dildo/vibe and do a live demo for her one casual afternoon.

Show her your own favorite BJ tricks, dick delights and special sweet spots on how you like your Lightning Rod to be sucked. Take turns and laugh alot. If there is a particular technique that turns her off, respect that and guide her to other areas of your cock that do not receive enough attention. Blow her mind, then allow her to jump back in the drivers seat so she can blow yours.

6. Return The Favor

00884282de6e784d7cae40188d210473This does not have to become a tit for tat situation, but consider returning the favor.

Before you immediately jump to assuming that means she wants you to give her head in exchange, think twice and ask her, “In what ways can I offer you pleasure that I normally do not do for you?”

Women are wired differently than most men. Her erotic foreplay desires may include a candle lit bubble bath, or a slow and sensual hot oil massage, or a twenty minute foot rub while you nibble on her toes. It may even be cleaning out the god-damn garage she’s been nagging you to do for the past year… A “BJ for a BJ” may not be what SHE truly desires to turn up the passion. Get into her world and pamper her to HER liking, and I guarantee you will get alot more blow jobs in the long run.


52220a6e98432aba787a5accd078d19eOnce your woman re-discovers how to enjoy worshiping your Blessed Banana Boat, it will no longer feel like an “obligation” to her.

It will become a gift she freely and enthusiastically gives you after you come home from a long stressful day at work, or to celebrate a special occasion, or to fill in the blanks during the week she is on her period and you are not shagging.

When “BJ duty” transforms into a place of spiritual practice and worship, she will be filled with delight to honor her man as the Sacred Sex King that you truly are.

And low and behold, suddenly your woman will not be able to keep her lips off your Lingham.


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P.S. Dear Ladies, if you are interested in getting more coaching on how to become a better lover while having your own needs met with the man of your dreams, check out my Empowered Women in Love Mastery Program!